Just doing me….

Hey there!

This is for anyone who feels their kindness is mistaken for weakness or stupidity…..

Growing up I was told that “you are nobody special”,  “you are no better than anyone else” and more importantly, “treat others how you would like to be treated” -thanks mother.

As much as the woman who spoke those words, and I, no longer have a relationship, her words still ring loud in my mind. You see, despite everything that has happened between her and I; I believe those words are some what, if not totally, true!

I am not special. I am not “better” than anyone else. It’s taken me a while, but I now also know, that I am NOT less than anyone else either. We are all equal, and we should all try daily, to treat others in a manner that we would like to be treated. 

Each of us have the ability and the choice to live, and be, the best version of ourselves; unfortunately not everyone shares my views. 

I believe that 

  • we are all special to “someone”
  • we are all deserving of equality and a good life
  • we should practice kindness and be mindful to all, always

This is what I am struggling with. I feel I am an open book. What you see is what you get. I feel that I am, in general, a “glass half full” type of person. But most importantly, I am genuinely happy to lend a hand to others, or/and be a supportive friend, or just do my job to the best of my ability; now this may shock some……but, it’s for no other reason other than wanting to do something nice, and be the best version of me, that I can be! There is NO ulterior motive. There is NO  “real” reason for me doing what I do. It’s NOT because I’m wanting anything in return. Shock horror! 

What I’ve learned, is that me simply doing me. Me genuinely doing something for others from a place of love, clearly bothers some people. What I’ve also learnt is that, this is their problem, not mine. If simply being a good natured person, is triggering emotion within others that they are uncomfortable with, or prompts them to behave and speak about people in a negative way, then that is something they need to work on. 

I certainly always try to be considerate and fair. I will always choose to be kind, and to choose love over hate. This does NOT make me weak. This does NOT make me stupid. I’m not gonna lie; it does make me angry, it does makes me sad, it prompts me to self reflect and assess, but it also makes me strong and determined.

Determination to be strong emotionally. Strong mentally. Determination to stand strong in my morals; something I will not compromise on. And most importantly, determined to be kind to myself. To put my health and wellbeing, for not only me, but also my family first and foremost, whilst holding strong in my faith. Faith in my intuition, God/Universe, when I’m searching for the strength, in knowing when to walk away….

We are all equal. We are all special. We are all capable of giving understanding, love and kindness; some unfortunately, simply choose not to. 

And if you are strong enough to be a kind hearted person; please know that it certainly is not stupidity, or a weakness ❤️

It’s not our job to play judge and jury, to determine who is worthy of our kindness and who is not. We just need to be kind, unconditionally and without ulterior motive, even – or rather, especially – when we’d prefer not to be.  ~Josh Radnor

Until next time, take care of you.

Trene x

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No Regrets….

Hey there!

Well we are in; the house I mean. There is still LOADS to do, which meant for the first week of us living there, my alarm clock was tradies; tradies STILL working on the house, but we are here. 

At the moment I’m kinda comparing house building to pregnancy and birth. At first, you are unsure because whether you have just discovered you are growing another human being, will be birthing, and then responsible for that little human being for the rest of your days, or are buying or building your home; it’s a big financial commitment. Then excitement sets in. Ideas start to flow about the design and what your home will look like. You meet with the architect to go over drawings and the design brief (similar to looking at your baby’s first ultra sound and making sure that every is how it should be), meet with the trades who will ultimately be the ones you’re entrusting to follow the plans, to deliver you your home within the estimated time frame allowed. You move in, fuss and cluck (nest), then sit back and take the time to admire your new surroundings. Just like labour and birth, all of the emotions that you felt during the whole process begin to feel like a very distant memory. You look around at what you’ve achieved and can see that it was all worth it. Until of course your husband says…….

 “we should build another one!”

 Ummmm, NO! See the comparison? Just like pregnancy and childbirth!

Anyway, life is slowly returning to a more mellow, relaxed state. I’ve stopped heading to our old address whenever I leave the house, and my mind has recalibrated my internal compass to our new home. The kids have settled; son number one moved out with some mates, then work took him to Brisbane, so to make life financially easier; he has just now moved home. Son number two is working, enjoying life as a young adult, and playing the sport he loves (football). The baby of the family, and now also officially the tallest, is (besides enjoying school life) having a fantastic football season and looking forward to heading to London in Sept/Oct to play, train and further develop his football skills. 

Oh and also, son number one is just about to turn 21! When did that happen? It only feels like yesterday that I was experiencing the uncertainty I mentioned earlier; when you discover you are going to be a parent….. next minute you blink, turn around once and he’s turning 21! 

Just the other night, Craig and I were reflecting; as much as my life path has been bumpy, and at some points just a downward spiral; I have no regrets. Every little moment and encounter has led me to the here and now. Each event, despite how it made me feel at the time, has moulded and shaped me in to the person I am today. And all of those bumps, spirals, twists and turns on my journey lead me to Craig, and because of him……we now are five. 

Regrets, definitely not; blessings in disguise I like to think ♥︎  

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Until next, take care of you 

Trene x

Surrender and trust…..

Hey there!

So, we are currently building ourselves a new home…..

“Build a house”, they said.

“It will be fun”, they said.

“I know people who owe us favours”, he said.

Well, I’m going to be brutally honest here. It hasn’t been all fun, smiles, sunshine and laughter. It has rained for nearly the whole build process. There were days, and I mean days, of simply shoveling red mud. Plans have been changed (mainly because they weren’t drawn correctly to start with). Lazy tradies, or no tradies. And because we are building on a sloping block, the logistics of simply getting materials to site and then up to the right level, has been nothing short of hard work; either by negotiating the delivery people getting the materials where they need to be, or us just simply pumping up our muscles and physically moving them ourselves. It has been, and still is hard work; physically, emotionally and mentally.

I actually thought that because our marriage had survived heart wrenching, punch in gut, sit me on my arse lows; building a house would be a marriage walk in the park…….

UMMMM, NO……F*%#KING WRONG!!!!

High school sweethearts. Together since 16; 27 years in fact, and married for 22 of those this coming August. Together, I thought that we had been through, and seen it all regarding marriage; how wrong was I ???

I mean, I’m not trying to be a “negative Nancy” or anything, but this whole process (and believe me, it ain’ t over yet) has been one of the most emotion fuelled, rollercoaster of an event, that I have endured.

Theres been shouting, object throwing, swearing, threats made, loads of tears, and……. oh wait- that’s just from me! Poor Craig….he really has had, and continues to have, the patience of a saint through out this whole experience. All of my “everything will happen when its meant to happen” mantra packed up, waved bon voyage (probs flipped me the bird as well) and is currently on vacay, in some unknown holiday destination.

Me, being me, has been looking at this from a teaching view-point. What am I supposed to learn from this? How can I grow through this? What came back to me was; surrender, trust, patience and acceptance.

Surrender ALL of my fears surrounding this experience to the Universe.

Accept what I have no control over.

Practice patience. Have patience for the whole process; with not only others, but also myself.

Trust in the process, that it will all work out.

Trust that we will be in the house when the timing is right.

And most importantly……

Trust in my love for Craig, and the commitment we have each made to our relationship. We CAN do this. We DO have this.  The Universe DOES have our back!

“……when you think you have surrendered, surrender more.”

~Gabrielle Bernstein; The Universe Has Your Back.

Until next time, take care of you.

Trene x

 

 

♥︎ Self love meditation ♥︎

Hey there!

So, I’ve made a self-love guided meditation……..

Hopefully the link I provide will work for you to try. I have not done anything like this before. I mean, I meditate; I just haven’t made, or led a meditation before. Me doing this for you, is really out of my comfort zone! {please be nice….}

It is by no means, a lengthy, drawn out medi. Just a simple, approximately 10 minute meditation, that can easily be done in the car waiting for kids to finish school, or while waiting for trainings to finish.

This is something that I implement within my day-to-day life. It’s amazing how centred and peaceful I feel, after doing a meditation. All to often, when life gets busy, we tend to forget to stop and reconnect with ourselves; we end up swept up in kids, work, chores and overlooking the most important thing- ourself!

“To be emotionally available for others, we firstly need to be emotionally available to ourselves”

Anyway, that’s enough from me for now. Hopefully you can find my self-love gift to you here

Enjoy!

Until next time, take care of you.

Trene x

Note to self 🖤 and anyone else who might need it……

Hey there!

I’m not gonna lie, having a positive outlook on life is great for a healthy mind and body, but in saying that……shit happens.

Relationships go through their highs and lows. Finances come and go; for me lately it’s like I’ve thrown our finances a f*#king Bon Voyage party-  just sayin’!
In saying that….

Life happens.

When life does happen, it’s easy to be swept up in all of the drama, negative, and shitty energy around those circumstances. It’s easy to accept your own invitation to your “let’s feel sorry for myself” pity party, and bask in the energy of negativity. This is exactly when you need love and positivity the most.

I know from experience how easy it is to allow your thoughts to wander to a dark and gloomy place in your mind. I also know that the longer you hang out there, in that heavy, dark cloud of anxiety/depression/fear/self-doubt, the longer and harder it is to allow light, love and positivity back into your mind and heart.

Love hard. Love harder and stronger than you ever have. Look for all the positives you are surrounded by; even when there appears to be none. Seek a friendly ear from a trusted family member, friend, or the universe/God/ Spirit (insert whatever is applicable for you)…..

Search for the lesson within the negativity. If I have learnt anything lately that I can share, it’s this….there is always a lesson. And, until we have learnt, grown and developed management strategies from what we need to learn, we will continue to be shown this lesson. It maybe presented differently each time, but believe me, it’s the same lesson!

Despite what is going on in your world, regardless to how overwhelmed with “crap” you are, and even when you feel that you just can’t catch a break- remember that YOU ARE WORTHY  🖤

When you finally see your own worth, you will only then know your true greatness and potential……

Surrender to peace and love. And be kind, to everyone…..but mostly, be kind to yourself.

Until next time; take care of you,

Trene x

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Inspire, and to be Inspired 💖

Hey there!

So, 2017 finished on a high for me and my family. Our eldest son went into his second year as an apprentice builder and spent time sailing the Fraser Coast; our middle son graduated year 12, had his formal, scooted off to schoolies, then ventured to the U.K for football (soccer) and, then returned home to start work and commence training for his new football team. Our youngest accepted on invitation to travel to England (yes, for football) and commence training and playing with his new club-phew!

2018, what a year we are about to embark on………

Our eldest turns 21. Our middle son turns 18. Our baby (who is 14 this year), is heading off to England for football, AND in amongst those things, we are building a house. Exciting to say the least!

We have been living in QLD now for 14 years this coming September, and it has only been now that the stars have aligned for us, to allow us the opportunity to build/buy our home. I know without a doubt, that we are meant to be doing this right now. Every knock back, every time a contract has fallen through, and every prayer in the past that wasn’t answered, has led to us to the here and the now.

Everything happens for a reason,and for whatever the reason is, now is the time for us….

Speaking of 2018 and the now, every new year I take the time within my meditation practice to reflect on the past year, and to set my intentions for the new year, to allow myself to be open to receiving a word, phase; a theme if you like, to guide me through the upcoming year. This year, my intention is to, be inspired or inspire, through self alignment…

I pondered this over for a bit-days actually. I allowed ego to dissect my intention, and push it from my mind; every time I gave permission for that to occur, an event would transpire that would make me acknowledge my intention and own it.

You see, I believe that we are here to be happy.

God/the Universe/spirit (insert whatever is applicable for you) wants us to be living the best life we can, with the circumstances we have been given. Our souls/higher self want to be happy and living a life of “alignment”. My alignment will differ from others; what is heartfelt and good for my soul, will differ to others around me.

When I am truly aligned, my heart and soul sings ( I literally sing, even if I sound woeful), I feel like I am connected to my higher self, kinda like I “remember” why I’m here. My heart is full of love, kindness and compassion to all; and that is what I hope to inspire in others. For everyone to feel aligned, for everyone’s heart to feel full, and for everyone to see/think/feel inspired to live the best life they can, given the circumstances that they have been given.

I have been blessed along the tail end of last year to connect with like-minded people through my love of essential oils. I have sat on the sidelines watching, as well as tentatively interacting with them, but more importantly, allowing myself to be inspired by these beautiful souls of women, that I have had the pleasure of connecting with. I am  implementing the oils into my daily practices more and more, I use them to compliment the lifestyle I choose to live, the diet I choose to eat, and the toxic free environment I choose to immerse myself in (this to me means people, energy and chemicals), and hopefully, I may inspire others the way these ladies have, and continue to inspire me.

So, this year for me is going to be busy. But, my heart is full, I am feeling inspired and aligned, and I can not wait to see what manifests for myself and my family as 2018 unfolds.

Happy 2018.

Until next time, take care of you.

Trene x

Rituals ✨

Hey there!

LIGHT BULB MOMENT ALERT! 

We all have them. That moment where it feels like you’ve been forehead slapped. That moment where you actually say ” a-ha” out loud. In amongst my latest (not necessarily my greatest) wave of panic and anxiety, it hit me……“A-HA, that’s it!” I had/have been so consumed with anxiety, that I had forgotten to actively participate in two of my many, but ever so important, daily rituals. Which (in my mind) has contributed, to why I have been seriously overwhelmed with life.

Firstly…….

  • Big Rocks & Little Rocks; my awesome gratitude journal/diary has a space allocated to the beginning of each month, to list my goals for the month. BIG ROCKS = the goal/s; LITTLE ROCKS = the how/what steps I need to take, what course of action is required and how to implement those strategies to successfully achieve my desired outcome= GOAL/BIG ROCK.

I totally skipped that part of October {gasp!}

Now the biggie……….

  • The Attitude of Gratitude; every single day, without fail, I give thanks for absolutely everyone and everything that crosses my path. Normally, I take the time at the end of the day, when the kids and hubby are tucked up in bed, to write at least three things from the day, that I am grateful for. I mean, I give thanks mentally each morning and night, but what I have been failing to do recently was; WRITE THAT SHIT DOWN!!

You see; like a legal document, or binding contract between two parties, when you take the time to hold space, write down exactly what you are grateful for, what your monthly/weekly/daily intentions (goals),  you are actively showing up and participating with setting intentions. It sets the precedent, “seals the deal”, between your higher self and the Universe/God/Spirit for more good, loving and positive experiences and people, to enter your life. Gratitude is one of the most important elements for success.

Looking back over the past month, I was successfully not showing up. I was no longer actively participating in the what/who I was/am grateful for. When I did take the time to give thanks and express gratitude, I did it mentally. Reflecting back, I was hurriedly  doing it from a primarily fear based emotion of panic, and anxiousness, not from a place of love and acceptance.

I allowed fear to override the feeling of love. I subconsciously gave permission for fear to take hold and keep me down. It’s easy to do. When you are emotionally and mentally exhausted, it is easy to find comfort, and surrender to fear and negativity. It’s bloody hard work getting up, putting on your big girl pants, and facing fear head on; but in saying that, I’ve learned that love and positivity is stronger 🖤 I’ve forgiven myself for letting these sacred rituals that I hold dear to my heart slip. And, I’ve given up keeping score with anxiety, with who wins each battle. I am though, determined to outright win the internal war!

So, on the tail end of my light bulb,”a-ha”moment, I am promising myself, that no matter how I’m feeling, I WILL show up. I WILL honour the soul contract that I have made between my higher self and the Universe. And, I WILL continue to implement my daily rituals, despite how I’m feeling!

And, on that note; I’m off to journal. Tomorrow is a new month, I have BIG ROCKS and LITTLE ROCKS to plan…..

Until next time, take care of you.

Trene x

P.S Before I go, I have to say, doTERRA oils are the best #justsayin’

Hopefully, I’ll share more on that next time…..

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